Movie Review: Transformers: Dark of the Moon

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Paramount Pictures is trying to get a jump on the Fourth of July long weekend by releasing Transformers: Dark of the Moon early. One of the reasons is that the movie is long, close to three hours, two hours and thirty-seven minutes to be exact meaning that theaters will lose one to three showings per day depending on when they start their day. If they released on Friday, Paramount would lose the equivalent of a day’s showings over a regular weekend. For those three hours, the pace kept me engrossed so that the time flew by although, I would suggest avoiding any big drinks before the show begins!

Just a few weeks ago we found out via the X-Men the real reason for the Cuban Missile Crisis and this week we found out what really drove the space race of the 1960’s. A ship from Cybertron crash landed on the dark side of the moon. It was a battle between the USSR and USA to see who could get there first. That was the reason, not attempting to push the boundaries of man’s knowledge and give them inspiration. Buzz Aldrin was sworn to secrecy until now! Ahhh, what little we know about our true US history and its motivations!

It’s been about a year since the last Autobot and Decepticon battle back on Earth. Sam Witwicky (Shia LaBeouf) has a new girlfriend Carly (Rosie Huntington-Whiteley) and they live together in an old theater. He helped save the world not once, but twice and he can’t find a job and it’s wearing on him heavily. Maybe he’s not meant to be a 9 to 5 person, but the savior of the human race many times over so he should just hang back and chill until the next opportunity arises.

Abraham Lincoln once asked “At what point shall we expect the approach of danger?” to which his answer was “if it ever reach us, it must spring from amongst us. It cannot come from abroad.” This played true on different levels within the movie. Eventually with the discovery by the Autobots of what was on the dark side of the moon, another battle breaks out between humans, the Autobots and the Decepticons. This time, Chicago becomes the battlefield for the invading forces rather than Los Angeles.

There is something for just about everyone in the film. You have the science fiction aspect, conspiracy theories, over the top humor and situations, eye candy and wildly enormous battle sequences which are a good portion of the movie. The PG-13 rating for intense prolonged sequences of sci-fi action violence, mayhem and destruction, and for language, some sexuality and innuendo are very appropriate descriptions of the contents. But you have to wonder at times, why is it that the Autobots are just wheeled vehicles and they don’t innately fly or dig or as one character pointed out “get all the good stuff”? The movie lacked in creating any emotional connection to the characters, but did a great job with fights and blowing up stuff. Don’t expect a lot of touchy feely moments to connect emotionally with the characters. Do expect lots of anarchy, explosions and the drama leading to the massive amounts of damage! You know, the typical Michael Bay film.

The Movie Monkey

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